Why do things change?

I am a college freshmen and I came home for the weekend. This would be my second time home. The first time it was good and I got to see friends and hang out with them. Everything was fine then, but not this time. I went to a football with some friends that I became really close with at the end of my senior year. We hung out last time I came home and everything was fine, but this time it was just different. I feel like they were leaving me out of things, which they were. I just feel like that is something high schoolish to do. Maybe, it's because now I know what a true friendship is because I actually know people that truly care about me. It just didn't feel the same as it did before. It is a little sad because I really want to still be included in things, but I think it's a good thing that they might not be including me. I think that I am the only one that actually has made new friends that truly care about me. I feel like I have started to form a new family and they haven't yet. It took me this long to realize what a true friend actually is and now I know that maybe some of the people in high school that were my "friends" were truly never my friends. They care, but they don't care at the same time. I know that the only reason I really keep in contact with them is because I still want that connection to people that I knew before, I still want people to hang out with when I come home, or people that I have grown up with around me. I want that familiar face to be there. I really don't know where I am going with this, I just have to get my feelings out. I really don't know where any of this came from either, I just have so many thoughts and really don't have anyone that I can talk to at three in the morning. I really just think it might be me over reacting to all of it, but I just can't get this out of my head. It's crazy to think that people that I have only know for two months truly actually care about me and people that I know for years are giving up on me. Are they jealous because I am actually growing up and actually starting to create my own life out on my own? I feel like they are all on a different level then me now. I know that it might be a bad thing to say, but it's true. I can't really help that they haven't started to create there life out on their own yet. There is so much more I can say, but I think I should probably stop before I continue to upset myself.